The Griffs

Griffin scout law

Lenny Struanberg VC — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 22:51:16 +0000

Gentlemen

I would like to begin by admitting that I have not performed my Griffin scouting duties within the law and oath that a true Griffin scout should abide by. I therefore feel it is necessary to make it clear to all those who wish to follow the Griffin scouting fraternity to read and live the Griffin scouting law. It is my true honour to present the Griffin scout’s oaths and laws:

Scouting Oath

1. A Griffin scout will do his duties to God and the King Griffin.
2. A Griffin scout will do his best to help his fellow Griffs despite whatever it may cost him.
3. A Griffin scout knows the Griffin scouting laws and will obey them.

And now for the law:

1. A Griffin scouts honour is to be trusted.
2. A Griffin scout is loyal to the Griffin King and to his fellow Griffs, and to his country.
3. A Griffin scout is a friend to all and a brother to every other Griffin, no matter to what social class the other belongs.
4. A Griffin Scout smiles and whistles under all circumstances. (My favourite)
5. A Griffin scout is thrifty.

There are other laws but I decided to scrap them from the Griffin laws cause they were dodgy and can be seen to make us weak.
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The battle of Chiswick Bridge

Lenny Struanberg VC — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 22:36:33 +0000

The hot English winter day of February 21, 2009, would forever change the lives of 12 young boys and 1 old man from South West London. When an urgent plea came from Griffin Walrus to come and assist his defence against an approaching force of over 50 Hampstead and Westminster men, they came from every direction and all walks of life. This is their story . . .

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Ezekiel 25:17

Lenny Struanberg VC — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 22:29:04 +0000

“The path of the righteous team is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of biased umpires. Blessed is he who in the name of the Griffs shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost motivation. And we will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy our brothers. And you will know our name is The Griffs when we lay our vengeance upon thee.”

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Snow Pigs, Walruses and Tramps

Lenny Struanberg VC — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 22:26:19 +0000

The pre-match gossip was everywhere, indeed the fixture promised much. On paper - a full strength Griffin team was primed with the return of key Griffins Pacman and Judge. The opposition - Tulse Hill & Dulwich, an attacking team with pace up front benefiting from momentum on the league table.

Despite a home advantage the Griffins suffered an early set back in the form of a 10am push back. However, not to be beaten by the early start Griffins from the four corners of London (including Griffin Scale of Reading) began to turn up. All but Griffin Baar managed to beat the cold, travel problems and early start. Sources on the ground suggest his absence was down to an evening of rampant gay sex and a terrible rash resulting from the use of several tubes of KY jelly.

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So this is Griffmas as the 2A’s are brushed aside

Lenny Struanberg VC — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 22:19:25 +0000

The last five months have seen unprecedented global turmoil in the world economy. Job losses, recession predictions, large-scale fraud and flaccid housing markets have plagued the headlines without respite, leaving most Londoners reeling with anxiety and grappling for a glimmer of light in the seemingly endless dark void that is the future. However, as with everything, there is always the diamond in the rough; a glimmer of maroon light that pierces the blackness and warms the soul; a true testament to consistency that is the rise and rise of the Griffins. Having been embroiled in these circumstances with little time to liaise with my chief public relations officer (who deserves a special mention for taking much punishment in my absence), I once again I find myself reporting on an explosive first season half in a new league with the Griffs, their right boot firmly fixed up the proverbial ar$e of Europe ahead of the Christmas break.

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Anyone drop a few Spence?

Raggy Omar — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 15:07:12 +0000

Saturday saw the Griffins return to their home turf on a mission spelt “redemption”, after the previous week’s crushing defeat at the hands of the 2As. This week against the Spencer 4s , in an epic display of humility, they snatched victory; a defeat that could only have been more appropriately administered had the opponents been bent over on the halfway line and the Griffins wielding six foot maroon rubber d1ld0s. (more…)

HTHC de-DEBRIEF

admin — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 00:31:13 +0000

After a tour of legendary proportions I can only compliment the great Nunchucks of Nederlands (with yellow number plate) with his outstanding performance of organising.However, I leave it up to the rest of the Griffins ranks to take what they are offered and turn it into a memorable moment.

Look to the following for justice:Facebook from Theken Gold:

http://www.new.facebook.com/album.php?aid=66701&id=750491410

http://www.new.facebook.com/album.php?aid=66701&id=750491410&ref=mf

Facebook from the Pykey:

http://www.new.facebook.com/album.php?aid=140599&id=822940098&ref=mf

And From Baarrr:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/thegriffs/sets/72157606563925496/

HTHC Hamburg Debrief

nunchuck — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 00:11:16 +0000

Dear Griffs,

before you read any further, pls open Your Song of Billy Paul.

Is it running?

Excellent. Than I can talk now.

It was certainly a tournament to remember: smashing weather, 4 days/nights of non-stop partying and the easiest Boatrace victory of the century against a team that calls themselves Hectolitres. And let us not forget that we secured the awards for the Best Dancer of the Tournament (Rory) and prestigious Most Drunken Player of The Tournament Award (Rory again). The award ceremony is documenten with the pictures attached.

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The B/G ratio- it’s science

Lenny Struanberg VC — Thu, 20 Mar 2008 17:02:34 +0000

When working out which European festival we should attend, there was only one sensible solution from Dr Gepetto……

Let’s get scientific about this. While both destinations will not disappoint as far as quality goes, let’s be honest, while quality over quantity is important…..quality AND quantity is simply better!!!

We should calculate the B/G ratio for each tournament (B/G ratio: Bush to Griffin ratio). It’s a very simple valuation ratio of a tournament’s potential female attendance compared to the number of touring Griffs.

Example - with 13 touring Griffs, should the following tournaments host the following numbers, we will see how their B/G ratios compare (a high B/G is good):
Kiel - 6 touring ladies teams x 14 players = 84 divide by 13 = B/G 6.46
Konstanz - 8 touring ladies teams x 14 = 112/13 = B/G 8.6
Duesseldorf - 7 touring ladies teams x 14 = 98/13 = B/G 7.53
Hertogenbosch - 10 touring ladies teams x 14 = 140/13 - B/G 10.76

We can immediately see that Hertogenbosch would be the most suitable tournament.

VC and Numchucks, please report back with the expected B/G ratios for each of these tournaments so that planning may commence!!!

Yours in bush tactics,
Dr Gepetto

Educating Oxford

Lenny Struanberg VC — Tue, 11 Mar 2008 16:35:56 +0000

I would like to second the commendation for Griffin Jeroen Nunchuk for his superb organisation of the Poetry In Motion weekend, and reassert my dismay that he was unfortunately incapacitated and unable to attend (although his liver is currently thanking it’s lucky stars - in complete contrast to mine).

For those not in attendence I am happy to report that the Students were educated in the ways of hockey: we won 10-0… just to make the 2As THINK we got a walkover.

With the 2As playing the Oxford Students next week, and with the Students’ term having finished last week, they can safely chalk up their 4th (!) 10-0 walkover of the season. (Is that even allowed?)

All of which means that, as VC said, if we win our final 2 games of the season against Hampstead & Westminster (away) and Old Loughts (away) we’ll be crowned Division 3 Champions.

Finally, for those unable to experience the sophistimacated delights of the Griffs’ poetry on Saturday evening, here’s a taster of what the good people of Oxford were forced to enjoy:

IF…

IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and shouting at the umpire,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
And don’t pass to you when you’re wide open

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
When you’re a substitute and the rain is falling,
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by fools intent on getting you fined;

If you can dream – of another year of promotion;
If you can think – that the 2As don’t deserve the title;
If you can meet with Chappers and Robbo;
And treat those two impostors just the same;

Yours is Richmond and everything that’s in it,
And - which is more - you’ll be a Griffin, my son!

Pykey Pykey